Lonely Memories
by Raine20oo
Summary: I can’t protect you… Without holding a sword… I can’t embrace you… Whilst holding a sword… What if I… Couldn’t save you…? IchiRuki


_I can't protect you…_

_Without holding a sword…_

_

* * *

  
_

Death. It was on the tip of their tongues and the corners of their hearts.

But wasn't that what they were? _Death?_

He meant everything to her. He was her past, present, and future.

There was no life without _him_.

Rain fell, slowly flooding the streets.

Grayness… the skies held heavy clouds.

It was lonely.

She blamed it all on herself.

Destruction was lacing her home.

And she could do nothing.

So she forgot.

Forgot _everything._ Except her memories of _him, _that escaped to the farthest reaches of her mind.

They couldn't take that away from her.

* * *

She meant everything to him.

She had given him a purpose to his life.

What he had always wanted.

He could now _protect them_, in ways nobody else could.

He could protect _her,_ in ways nobody else would.

He loved her, though wouldn't admit that to anyone, least of all himself.

His sword sliced through already disintegrating flesh, the smell of it left nightmares.

"Rukia," her name was barely whispered, softly leaving his lips, taste lingering. He savored it for a moment, letting himself memorize it.

A smile tugged at his lips as he remembered all the times she had cursed him and his name when he had first rescued her.

And he hadn't just saved her once, but from many things.

Mostly herself.

He was going to rescue her this time.

If he lost his arms…

He would kick his way to her.

And if he lost his legs…

He would drag himself.

He would kill the ones who dared harm her.

That he swore.

But… He had never expected that he would have to save himself… from her.

He was defenseless. He couldn't fight _her_, he couldn't kill _her._

It was impossible.

The best he could do…

Was drop his sword.

* * *

_I can't embrace you…_

_Whilst holding a sword…_

* * *

Smiles, laughter, a face…

Full of warmth, and light, filled her thoughts.

And she woke up with a craving for strawberries.

Her _family_ moved about, already up and moving around.

But _they _didn't occupy her thoughts…

The man with the orange hair did.

* * *

Large, round, innocent, violet eyes filled his head.

Soft red, luscious lips and short, raven-black hair followed.

The scent of his strawberry shampoo.

That little moocher must've stolen it.

But at the moment he couldn't find the will to care.

* * *

Darkness…

What- what was happening to her?

Pain… blood-curling _pain _enveloped her and she _screamed_.

Was he doing this?! The man with the orange hair?! Stop it! _Please!_

Her pain distressed him. And he screamed- no, _roared_ her name.

But it didn't matter anymore, she was sinking.

Into this blackness with nothing but the taste of strawberries on her tongue and bright orange flashing across her eyes.

* * *

A stab.

A block.

A slice.

He dodged, unable to do anything but that.

Her eyes… cold and closed off, showed nothing.

Like she was cut off from the world.

As if she couldn't _hear _him saying her name _over and over _like a mantra to some unknown God.

Heaven knows he needed to pray.

So he did.

* * *

_What if I…_

_Couldn't save you…?_

_

* * *

_

The sword slid easily through her flesh.

His sobs filled the air.

He buried his nose into her hair, tears splashing onto her face.

"Rukia… Rukia _please don't die." _He begged, the one person he needed to _protect the most_, was dying by his hands.

What kind of twisted god… would-... would...

His useless, _useless _sword clattered to the ground as he embraced her, folding over her petite body as if that would save her.

* * *

Ichigo…

That was his name…

Ichigo.

She remembered now.

She remembered everything.

What was this pain? Burning through her stomach?

Why was Ichigo… _crying…?_

He _never _cried.

"Ichi-… go…" she struggled to form the words, as liquid bubbled through her lungs.

"Rukia I love you. I love you_ so much._"

His confession was pathetic, she thought.

But that didn't matter, because she was _dying_.

"I love… you… too…" she tried to laugh at this.

Wonderful time to realize feelings.

But he didn't find this funny and he only started to cry harder.

"Don't die. Don't die. Don't die. Don't die. Don't die."

He repeated this phrase as if this would save her.

"You-… are… Such an… idiot…"

"Shut up," he hissed the words, before kissing her softly, tenderly.

Such a change…

Slowly, his scent and words and taste filling her senses, everything went black.

* * *

_Don't…_

_Don't leave me alone!_

_

* * *

_

Blackness…

Floating…

Was she dead?

She slowly tried to open her eyes…

Nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

But…

If she was dead…

Why was she smelling strawberry?

But before she could reflect on this, the best sound in the world echoed beside her.

"Rukia?"

* * *

**I got my inspiration for this from the Youtube video- Goodbye Rukia by Blossomfall.**

**May you rest in peace Blossomfall.**

**Great video, if you like this, give it a try.**


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